In the beginning of this whole break up thing, I was trying to lighten the mood by joking around. "Well, dammit there goes my Ring-By-Spring!" was a quote I said to quite a few people who knew about the status and intensity of my former relationship. A few people know Michael and I had talked about getting married, and a few know even more than that. But, anywho. While conversing with my sorority sisters, I often joked that now I would not be the reason for our ceremony for the newly engaged. I didn't think too much of it, until last night we all got to participate in it. I was so happy for my sister who was lavaliered, but I couldn't stop thinking that I would not be the one who would keep the boquet and tell her story to the chapter. Ever. I'm a second semester sophomore, I probably won't find anyone worth marrying any time soon. And even if I do, I probably won't get engaged until after graduation.
This also comes shortly after the most recent date party thrown by our fab social chair. It was great and all, but Michael had planned on coming with me to the party. Then the whole breeak up thing happened and I thought I would be fine with it. Nope.
Michael had attended a Halloween date party with me in October at a club I'll call XYZ. We had lots of fun getting our groove on and talking to people and whatnot. Bet you can guess where the most recent date party was held. Club XYZ. It didn't hit me really until I saw the other couples dancing like Michael and I did. I couldn't stop thinking that he should be here. He should be here, but he's not. It really set me off. Now I enjoyed the night, but only to a certain extent.
So that's been my mentality lately. He should be here. He should be laying in bed with me (This one is still really hard, and it's going to suck so bad when I go home for Spring Break.). I should be there with him. That should be me because of him. I know these things aren't going to happen anymore and it really sucks. I just wish he could be here.
Dammit Michael.
This also comes shortly after the most recent date party thrown by our fab social chair. It was great and all, but Michael had planned on coming with me to the party. Then the whole breeak up thing happened and I thought I would be fine with it. Nope.
Michael had attended a Halloween date party with me in October at a club I'll call XYZ. We had lots of fun getting our groove on and talking to people and whatnot. Bet you can guess where the most recent date party was held. Club XYZ. It didn't hit me really until I saw the other couples dancing like Michael and I did. I couldn't stop thinking that he should be here. He should be here, but he's not. It really set me off. Now I enjoyed the night, but only to a certain extent.
So that's been my mentality lately. He should be here. He should be laying in bed with me (This one is still really hard, and it's going to suck so bad when I go home for Spring Break.). I should be there with him. That should be me because of him. I know these things aren't going to happen anymore and it really sucks. I just wish he could be here.
Dammit Michael.
